Contemplating Forgiveness

I am awake tonight, my spouse in bed, and I am contemplating Forgiveness. Why, some may ask. And it is no wonder. I met my spouse at the age of 40… and came to the relationship with more than a little baggage. She knows that deeply. Even after 10 years of sharing love, passion, and life, I still have some work to do. Not life changing work. More like life affirming work.

I found a webpage and it speaks to me on this topic:

http://www.bhaktilife.com/forgiveness.html


“The spiritual path is a path of letting go of our false identities and learning to identify with our True Nature - the Self. Forgiveness is an essential element of letting go, a purification that clears away karma. Karma, both good and bad, binds us to our human existence. Karma is the unfinished business we have with the world. When Jesus hung on the cross he asked God to "forgive them, for they know not what they do." His Cosmic Compassion and Cosmic Wisdom allowed Him to forgive those who were torturing Him and to ask God to release them from the karma they were incurring. This freed not only His persecutors but Jesus Himself. Jesus is the perfect model for what we too must accomplish. Forgiveness goes hand in hand with compassion and wisdom. The more we cultivate compassion and wisdom the easier tasks like forgiveness become. Simultaneously, the more we forgive, the stronger our compassion and wisdom become. We too must cultivate Cosmic Compassion and Cosmic Wisdom, the Compassion and Wisdom of God. We too must forgive and free ourselves from karmic ties to those who have harmed us. Forgiveness equals freedom. Jesus had no illusions about the abusive actions of those who nailed him to the cross. Forgiveness is not condoning, forgetting or overlooking wrong actions. Jesus was not trying to reconcile with his persecutors. Forgiveness is not about reconciliation. Reconciliation takes two, but we are free to forgive without the participation of the other person. Forgiveness is the way we release ourselves from the bondage of painful memories. Our experiences shape our beliefs and our patterns of living. This works exactly like a computer program. Once programmed (learned) the program plays again and again in our mind and in our life. Our ability to learn makes us golf pros, lets us drive a car, or type words on a page. Our ability to learn also creates the same kinds of relationships with the same inherent problems, again and again. Most people move through their days as the unconscious victims of their own habits of thoughts and actions. Our habits are compulsions to repeat thoughts, feelings and behaviors. They can be positive or negative. Once established it takes effort to change a habit, but once changed a new, positive habit can lighten your burden (self-imposed) and bring joy back into your life. Forgiveness eliminates negative habits and creates positive ones. Forgiving allows us to release the burden of negative emotions and thoughts that accompany the painful memories of our lives. Imagine for a moment what it would be like to never have negative memories swirling through your brain. That is the freedom we are seeking.”

Ahhh, now I have outed myself. I am a Christian, and a proud one, finally. I will not allow those others to co-opt my spirituality. I have a lot to learn from my teacher. And for tonight, and for the next few days (weeks? months?) it is forgiveness.

The exercise of forgiveness seems to me to be one of the utmost intimacies with the Divine, in terms of human experience. To connect with the Divine in order to release another, and thus yourself, from that Karmic connection, means you MUST transcend the banal, and yes the pain, of our experience.

Someone hurts you. Time heals all wounds, yes? I say not. Traumatic Stress Disorder abounds, anger, rage, and revenge. What does it mean when a woman who as been raped can forgive her rapist? The act of Forgiveness is not accomplished with time, but rather through spiritual effort, with or without the Aggressors participation. I choose without. I don’t need the person(s) who have been in my life and have hurt me to request Forgiveness. But for me to be free, to truly grow forward in my life, I must release them. Forgive and not forget. Forgive and embrace them as perfect souls with imperfect acts on their own path to Perfection. As we all are. On our path to the Divine, on our path to Perfection, and on our path to knowing who it is we are, who it is we want to be, and always loved by God.